Thursday, April 25, 2013

Amazon Buys Out The Government...

Probably most of you have heard that Amazon was thinking (and still might) about buying the Postal Service?

That's an odd thought.

The stamps no longer would have Presidents or pictures of other things.  Instead, it would be the Amazon logo painted over Jeff Bezos' face.  Not cool.  Well, it might be, for a little bit.  But not long.

Just think.  On every single postage mark there would be a big:  "BUY KINDLE FIRE TODAY!!!"  And then have a physical link in blue that, when touched, teleports you to your computer and opens a new tab to the Kindle Fire page.

You never know what Amazon's going to think up next.

Which leads me to an even scarier thought.

With the Postal Service out of the way, Amazon will take out every other mailing service.  And then, it'll cost outrageous prices just to send a thank you or happy birthday note to someone a mile away.  But it's true (well, I mean...).

And then, because of random events (COMPLETELY unrelated to Amazon, of course) the Vice President and President resign, and then more people resign as soon as they are inaugurated, and then more people, and more people, until... *gasp*  There's only one man left to inherit the throne of presidency... the Post Master General (true fact, folks.  If enough people resign, the Post Master General would eventually become president from 'inheriting' it.)

And so, Amazon will be in charge of the Government, because Jeff Bezos will be the Post Master General.

Amazonwiki - I mean Wikipedia says this (signs already):

"Amazon.com lobbies the United States federal government and state governments on issues such as the enforcement of sales taxes on online sales, transportation safety, privacy and data protection, and intellectual property."

And just imagine.  Apple products will be banned, Microsoft will be bought out, and Kindle Paperwhites and Fires (and of course the new Kindles) will be the only E-Readers allowed.

The United States of American is going to be come The United States of Amazon.com (or United States of Amazon, I haven't fully read Jeff's mind yet).

Buuut, I wouldn't mind it at all.

Why?

Because Amazon made CreateSpace.  *thumbs up*  Totally makes it the best company ever.

3 comments:

  1. Buuuuuut. There's always a but.

    IF enough people resign, the Post Master General would normally become the President (I'm just going by what you're saying here, I haven't studied it), but if Amazon bought the Postal Service from the Government, it would no longer be part of the Government, and as such he would not be a government employee, and not be in any position to become the president. Right?

    (And I haven't studied how it all works in depth (not too relevant for me :P) so I don't know if my argument is flawed.)

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  2. I cannot believe I wasn't following your blog sooner . . .

    Interesting . . . not sure what you'd call it, but this is interesting anyway.

    Oh, and BTW, I tagged you: http://dreams-dragons.blogspot.com/2013/04/tagged-again.html (Sorry for doing it again, but I wasn't sure who else to do.)
    -LS

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  3. I wouldn't mind... I'm from NZ. They wouldn't control us.
    -Raptor

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